Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
