i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize