Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Randomize
