Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
