Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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