You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
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