The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
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