It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I need a beard to bite.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize