Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize