they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Randomize
