there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
FUCK WHALES
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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