i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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