doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
You were trust falling into bushes
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
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