Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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