Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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