That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
there was a trapeze. enough said
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'm gonna fight the coyote
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
