Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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