Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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