Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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