Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
