Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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