I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
