More tranny stories later!
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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