apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
