I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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