Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
