Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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