Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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