Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize