She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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