even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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