I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I just blew my weed a kiss
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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