so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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