He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Randomize
