I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
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