6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
