Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Randomize
