Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
