Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
