I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
