Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Dicks are not precious.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
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