yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
