Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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