Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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