I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
