Why are handjobs necessary in class?
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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