my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
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