I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize