I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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