But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize