There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
