Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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